Negative Plane - California Tour dates.

One of my favorite contemporary black metal bands is coming to California for two shows- San Francisco @ Thee (which brings up an issue I will address later) Parkside on April 10, and Los Angeles @ The Black Castle (misspelled on the flier) on April 11. If you like this kind of thing, then I suggest you go! it is not often that a real band like this tours. I have uploaded their album, Et In Saecula Saeculorum, for your listening pleasure. Follow the link, homes.

NEGATIVE PLANE - ET IN SAECULA SAECULORUM

Oh, and I just wanted to bring up one point... a matter of free floating hatred and an English lesson... Why do people insist on using the ancient THEE spelling to provoke the hard pronunciation of the E at the end of the word THE? It's so stupid! Thee is a totally different word, a form of THOU which means YOU, not THE. Please tell your friends to stop this idiotic madness.

Free Floating Agression 9/23/08

Shitty commercial time!

Last Sunday I got a text message from my friend reading, "The NFL is using a Smiths song." Incredulous, I asked, "Which one?" He replied, "Everyday Is Like Sunday." I couldn't believe it. It's actually a Morrissey song, but anyway, I was watching tv last night and the very commercial comes on. But it's a really shitty cover version. I wonder if Morrissey gave his consent or if that's even required?



The next one is a Snickers commercial for BBC that was pulled off the air because it is perceived as being homophobic. You tell me what you think.



And here's a little blurb I found on Youtube with some more gay-bashing rant from our buddy, Mr. T.

The Presidential Picks

Heard a funny story on NPR the other day. Like ta hear it? Here it go....

The two presidential candidates were asked to give their top ten songs. Kind of some odd picks in there. John McCain's number one is especially ridiculous:

John McCain's Top Ten

1. 'Dancing Queen' ABBA

2. 'Blue Bayou' Roy Orbison

3. 'Take a Chance On Me' ABBA

4. 'If We Make It Through December' Merle Haggard

5. 'As Time Goes By' Dooley Wilson

6. 'Good Vibrations' The Beach Boys

7. 'What A Wonderful World' Louis Armstrong

8. 'I've Got You Under My Skin' Frank Sinatra

9. 'Sweet Caroline' Neil Diamond

10. 'Smoke Gets In Your Eyes' The Platters

Barack Obama's Top Ten

1. 'Ready or Not' Fugees

2. 'What's Going On' Marvin Gaye

3. 'I'm On Fire' Bruce Springsteen

4. 'Gimme Shelter' Rolling Stones

5. 'Sinnerman' Nina Simone

6. 'Touch the Sky' Kanye West

7. 'You'd Be So Easy to Love' Frank Sinatra

8. 'Think' Aretha Franklin

9. 'City of Blinding Lights' U2

10. 'Yes We Can' Will.i.am

I'm not mad at ABBA by any means, but number one? Jeez, Louise, bro. Looks like someone forgot to grow a pair.

Actually, I don't really get Obama's number one, either. I mean, it's not as lame as McCain's, but almost like he was trying too hard.

In equally idiotic news, some idiot decided it would be a good idea to make a Barack Obama action figure. Don't fucking ask me.

Why do we have to have an action figure for ever prominent figure in American society? It's stupid. Save the petroleum it takes to make this pointless piece of plastic (that will probably be worth $3,000 in 20 years) and fill up your Escalade with it instead. All the full grown men that still collect toys should really reevaluate their lives.

My suggestion to curb this childish behaviour is for all the ladies out there: if you go over to a guy's house and he has action figures hanging on his wall, don't fuck him, and tell him why you aren't going to fuck him. He will quickly mend his foolish ways, and we will all be saved the pain of seeing our political figures being mocked by being modeled into a Curious George looking toy.

Another point against the mental retards that made this toy is that they are charging $15 for it, and only giving $1 to Obama's campaign for every toy sold on the internet. Weak.

Fucking American Shit-Cunts

I was watching the tube the other night when something terrible happened... a commercial. Yes, I know this is enough to drive anyone up the bloody wall, but I had some special disdain for this one.

It was a fricking Mars Bar commercial using the song Ça Plane Pour Moi by Plastic Bertrand. Great song. It always makes me sad when they use good songs for commercials because I can't focus as much hateful energy toward being subjected to advertising when it's on.



When I was looking for the commercial on the Youtubes, I stumbled upon this lil' doozy commited by Snickers. They use a really bad cover of the song for it.



Earhole cleaning time- the original song by Plastic Bertrand from 1978.



And now the weird gay and violent cover(?) version by Elton Motello, Jet Boy Jet Girl.



Download both versions of the song below-

Plastic Bertrand - Ça Plane Pour Moi

Elton Motello - Jet Boy Jet Girl

NXNP and Free Floating Aggression

This Saturday is gonna be masterful. You see, there's this dumb North X North Park thing going on.... but real quick, why does everyone have to rip other people's ideas off?

That does it. I am officially starting the Things That Are Pissing Me Off (also known as The Free Floating Aggression) section of my blog with this.

Why do people always steal everyone else's ideas instead of coming up with their own? Like _____aplooza. Have you seen this? All these idiots have decided that all you have to do when you are having some sort of event is to take a word and splice it with the last part of the Lollapalooza name, and everything will be fine. No, everything is not fine, butthole, especially when you do that. I don't want to go to Crabapalooza at Red Lobster, I don't want to go to Horseapalooza at the Del Mar Race Track, and I don't want to go to Faggypalooza at Balboa Park. How about my Fistapalooza in your Faceapalooza?

ALSO- no more fucking GOT MILK stickers! When, oh when will this bullshit cease? I mean I have seen everything: Got Sand? Got Dirt? Got Aloha? Got (picture of Calvin pissing on the Chevrolet symbol)? Why would I have sand? I ask you this.

I want to make one that says 'Got Creativity? No, obviously you don't, because you keep using this tired goddamn catch phrase that MILK doesn't even use anymore because it doesn't have to because every goddamned idiot in this god forsaken country uses it for their stupid little failing company's bumper sticker so every time I see it I think of MILK.' It'll cover my whole fucking window.

The solution to this problem is the same as the former: Got Fist In Your Face?

So anyway, this Saturday is gonna be fuckin sweet, bro. There's gonna be beer and bitches and some fuckin-A sweet ass killer bands. Yes, it's called North (by) North Park, just like SXSW. Yes, that is dumb. No, it doesn't make any sense because South by Southwest is referring to the position of Texas on the map, and North by North Park.... bro, it's just gonna be sweet-ass, bro. Alright?